Eagles, Giraffes and Jackals Preached for Wollaston Congregational Church January 31st, 2021 Scripture: Mark 1:21-28 Over the summer, while our girls were still living with us, we spent time together in our place by the lake. There are some lovely views of the lake from the house, but there is only one upstairs room accessible by a spiral staircase. Since the downstairs rooms were occupied for work and studying, and my husband needed to get on a Zoom call, I went upstairs for my time of prayer and reflection. I realized, then, that the window in the attic room gives a completely different view. Up high, I could see across the whole expanse of the lake, over the little islands, to the hills and mountains in the distance. I had a bird’s eye view, like that of the bald eagles who nest in the tallest tree on one of the remote islands in the middle of the lake. And so I imagined their perspective as they circle the landscape in search of food for their babies. And I remembered the biblical imagery of God as mother eagle, who has a panoramic perspective, and yet still keeps an eagle eye on the safety of her young. This “up high” perspective helped my spiritual processing. I could imagine letting go of my tense grip on some of the issues that were drawing my gaze downward. I could breathe more fully, inhaling and exhaling deeply. Somehow a panoramic view is also a God’s eye view. It is a view, not only of the moment, but of what can be and what will be. It is a view that leads to wellbeing. Our gospel scripture reading for today is from the first chapter of the gospel of Mark. We are still in this is dense chapter, written in the spare language of the oldest gospel. We need to take this scripture one bite at a time, and marvel at the way that each bite also contains allusions to the entirety of the Jesus story. This passage we heard today comes at the very beginning of Jesus’ ministry. He has recently recruited disciples: Simon, Andrew, James and John. They are in training, carefully following what Jesus does, listening to what Jesus says. On the Sabbath he leads them from shore of the Sea of Galilee to the synagogue in Capernaum. Jesus enters the synagogue and teaches the people, who marvel at his authority. But he is interrupted by a man possessed by an unclean spirit. The man must be tormented. He cannot even speak for himself. Instead the spirit cries out “What have you to do with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are, the Holy One of God.” The spirit recognizes Jesus for whom he is, the Holy One of God! The spirit is on guard, knowing that he doesn’t stand a chance up against the Spirit of the God of Israel. Some kind of self-preservation mechanism has put him on notice. The man is possessed by a defensive spirit, causing him to snarl and spit. Jesus has to say one word “Silence!” and then “come out of him.” The spirit loses power and leaves. The tormented man is healed and no longer possessed. This time the people are even more impressed with Jesus’ authority. Surely he must speak for God, as even the spirits obey him. When I read this story I remembered my experience in the attic room over the lake. And I imagined, if I had been present that day in Capernaum, taking a bird’s eye view of the scene, observing before analyzing, like the Eagle soaring above the lake. This brought me to two other animal metaphors: the giraffe and the jackal. These animals are used in the Nonviolent Communication tool developed by Marshall Rosenberg. You may remember that Nonviolent Communication uses observation, and identifies feelings and needs. When you use this style of communication, you are neither judgmental on yourself nor your conversation partner. You use “I” language, rather than “you” language. You avoid projecting or transferring feelings on the other. We all have the ability to be either the jackal or the giraffe in any given situation. When we’re stressed and anxious, the jackal in most likely to emerge. The jackal is our amygdala (or reptile brain) taking over. It happens when we fear danger or attack. This is sometimes called our “fight or flight” response. The jackal keeps his eyes low to the ground, focused on what is in front of him. He is inclined to be defensive and quick to attack. His ears are pricked up, looking out for enemies and competitors. In verbal conflict the jackal lashes out at the other using “you” language: “it’s your fault”, “you are so stupid.” It’s worth remembering that not everyone responds this way when stressed or anxious. Some engage a “tend and befriend” response, trying to quickly paper over the cracks of conflict. They turn the jackal on themselves, quick to apologize, saying things like “it’s all my fault, I shouldn’t have done that, I’m so stupid.” The giraffe is the response we use when we are in a position to observe and reflect like the eagle. The giraffe sees far and wide across the landscape. A herd of giraffe cooperates to avoid predators and find good grazing. The giraffe uses “I” language, and reflects on feelings and needs. I first encountered the giraffe and jackal language on a retreat I took a couple of years ago. One of retreat leaders was trained in Nonviolent Communication and she led an exercise using this imagery. We broke into small groups and each group gathered around a set of four chairs. First a focus person described the conflict they had experienced with someone else, then they sat in each of the chairs to look at the situation from each different perspective. I have remembered a time when I was a teenager. Our family had combined resources with my grandmother and we moved into a large stone Victorian home. The carriage house in the backyard served as the garage. We could just squeeze in my dad’s larger car and my mom’s mini in the back corner. This involved maneuvering back and forth through the narrow door, putting wing mirrors in peril. One day I knocked a wing mirror off the car for a second time. Of course, my dad was upset that the car would need to go back to the shop, and I was ready blame anyone and anything but myself. Here’s how the chair exercise plays out for this situation: The first chair is “Jackal ears out.” The jackal blames or criticizes the other person, saying “It’s your fault that … you are … you should ….” In the case of the garage incident I blamed my parents: “it’s your fault that we have this stupid garage, you should come up with a better plan for parking the cars.” This is the voice of anger. The next seat is “Jackal ears in.” The jackal blames or criticizes themself for the conflict. “It’s my fault … I am … I should ….” In this seat I blamed myself: “It’s my fault I knocked off the mirror, I’m a terrible driver, I should pay for the damage and never drive the car again.” This is the voice of guilt, shame and depression. The third seat is “Giraffe, ears in.” The giraffe connects to their feelings and needs, using language such as “I’m feeling … because I need or value …” In this seat I could acknowledge that I was feeling frustrated, embarrassed and tired. I needed competence in parking the car, or else acceptance that I was going to make a mistake sometimes. This is the voice of self-empathy. The fourth chair is “giraffe ears out.” The giraffe asks the other person “Are you feeling …. because you are valuing/needing …?” I could have said to my dad “are you feeling annoyed and frustrated, because you need honesty and accountability?” It is the voice of empathy. Giraffe ears in and giraffe ears out are both needed for our healthy communication. We need to be empathetic with ourselves and others. This morning, we began with the scene of Jesus in the synagogue in Capernaum on the Sabbath. The people are wowed by his preaching. But there is a jackal in the mix: it is the unclean spirit. The spirit in the man is on the defensive, immediately recognizing Jesus for who he is. The spirit knows that Jesus has the ability to silence him and cast him out. The spirit cannot bear to be in the presence of God. What is holy exposes what is unholy. Jesus observes the situation with giraffe ears out. The man is feeling tormented, he needs to be healed. Jesus rebukes the spirit, not the man. “Be silent! Come out of him!” The people are amazed, yet again. But they do not know what they are witnessing. This is just the beginning. Jesus travels with the disciples through the land, giraffe ears out, observing each situation. He hears every need, he takes in every feeling. Just two chapters later in the gospel of Mark, Jesus will call on the disciples to do the same. He will give them authority to drive out demons in his name. If you like, he is calling them to look at the world as giraffes too. In these times of ours, there are many jackals prowling around. Tensions are high, people are exhausted, the environment is perfect for inner jackals to come out. We can thank God that we have the example of another way, shown to us by Jesus. May we pray: Gracious God, who has the eye of the eagle, surveying the landscape, caring for and defending her young, give us the good graces of the giraffe, the one who enters each situation of contention silently observing, ears turned out to take in what needs to be heard, eyes turned toward the long view of your desires for the world. This week and into the future, we will engage in families, workgroups, classes and meetings. The tensions of our time provoke the jackals who will be prowling in weary souls, turning them competitive and defensive. Relieve us of those tensions, fill us with your grace and love, that we might be the healing the world needs so badly in these times. May all God’s people say, Amen
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
If you enjoy a sermon or have a question, please leave a comment. If you would like to quote any of my material in your own sermons or writings, please use appropriate attribution. I look forward to hearing from you!Archives
April 2022
Categories |